Born Again Experiance vs Prayer to ask Jesus into your life

I have had a life changing Born Again experience of Jesus coming into my heart. My life’s purpose, focus and desires have completely changed.
My husband has asked Jesus to come into his life…there isn’t a change, there isn’t a hunger for God’s Word, seeking to know Him.
Is a person saved by praying and asking Jesus into their heart/life?


According to Romans 10:9-10 I would say yes. There doesn’t seem to be one set of corresponding attitudes and actions post salvation. There can be those which have a more gradual progress to their relationship with God and they are just as saved as those who happen to have a more dramatic conversation.


Hello Delcie :slightly_smiling_face:

Thank you for your very interesting question as I think this is a common observation among believers at all different stages of our faith journey. In your case, you are wondering why your husband is not more on fire for the Lord. However, for many Christians, including myself early on when coming to Christ, I would look at those people who seemed to have such radical changes in their personalities from their relationship with Jesus, that it also made me wonder whether I was even saved. It is possible that your husband might even be thinking those thoughts himself.

I believe we all come into the faith with different degrees of revelation of God’s grace. Some of us are gifted with immediate hunger and transformation, others of us it seems to take much longer. Either way, it is always a gift of God and God knows best how to woo our hearts towards Him.

More specific to your question, in the New Testament there is no prayer recorded that people had to pray first before becoming a believer. So nothing like our Sinners Pray. It appears that most came to Christ by the Holy Spirit’s witness through the apostles and seeing the changed lives in other believers. But this does not mean that saying a prayer of faith is wrong. God knows the sincerity our hearts and whether we actually believe in Him. It is through faith that we are saved, whether that is proclaimed in a prayer or not.

1 John 3: 23-24: And this is his commandment, that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us. Whoever keeps his commandments abides in God, and God in him. And by this we know that he abides in us, by the Spirit whom he has given us.

1 John 5: 4: For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith.

For your husband it may be more about spending time praying with him and reading the word together and having others to fellowship with. Sometimes it takes time to just make the soil a little more nourished before we see some more growth. Take the time to travel at his pace and trust God to give the growth :slightly_smiling_face:.

God bless


@Sojourner I was praying and the same scripture that @Joshua_Hansen mentioned is the one that came to me, Romans 10:9:

if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.

I believe that the key point here is, “believe in your heart”. I prayed the sinner’s prayer a number of times but it was not until I truly believed with my heart that I was saved.

@Brian_Upsher I believe is spot on when he says that we all come to faith with different degrees of revelation of God’s grace. I heard a great preacher once say, “there is only one road into the kingdom, but when you are in there are many different roads”. What he meant by this is that faith in Jesus is the only way into the kingdom but that when we are in there are many different streams, denominations, interests, passions and we all have different personalities.

I will close by saying that a few years ago when I was doubting my faith and not in the word daily it was the faith of my wife and friends that brought me through that dark season. I hope this helps, if you have any more questions, let me know.


I am not in a position to comment on your husband’s specific case since I’ve never met him, and even if I did, only God can see the heart. So let me answer your question in generalized terms, and you and perhaps your husband can consider these thoughts and apply them as you see fit.

There are many reasons that someone might pray for “salvation” - not all of which necessarily lead to a genuine conversion. He might pray to please a loved one, or out of a religious custom, or to escape a problem, or to receive a blessing, or to feel better about himself, or gain favor in the community, or any of a score of reasons. But these are all natural motivations to pray. A Hindu or a Muslim or a Mormon could all pray to their gods for the exact same reasons. There is nothing supernatural going on in any of these.

But if the Holy Spirit burdens someone with guilt and dread over his sin, convicts him to seek deliverance from his sin, convinces him that the death of Christ paid for his sin and the resurrection of Christ would raise Him to new life as well, and if he comes to Christ in humble repentance, dying to self and his old life, and trusting Christ to give him a new life, then the actual words he may pray are secondary to what the Spirit of God is doing in His soul.

God be merciful to me a sinner - Luke 18:13; Remember me when thou comest into thy kingdom - Luke 23:42; I believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God - Acts 8:37; Lord, what wilt thou have me to do? - Acts 9:6 are all Biblical prayers for salvation. The heart is the real issue.

And a subsequent change on some level is the evidence that the salvation is real. It may be 30 fold, it may be 60 fold, it may be 100 fold - but it cannot be zero! Any branch that bears no fruit is a dead branch that is burned (John 15:6). If any man is not a new creation, if old things have not passed away, if all things have not become new, then what would II Corinthians 5:17 most likely mean regarding that person?

A faith that doesn’t change one’s direction will not change one’s destination.

A faith that doesn’t change one’s life will not change one’s afterlife.

I hope these thoughts will help the two of you to beware of false assurance and recognize a genuine conversion of the heart. Think about what that word “conversion” really means.


Hi Brian,
Thank-you, your reply has answered so many questions for me and you are so right, " it is possible that my husband might even be thinking those thoughts himself"… with tears in his eyes.
Your reply has given much peace to my heart and encouragement. It is so good to have those thoughts of doubt be put to rest and to place my confidence in God’s love for my husband.

Thank-you for these words ….
“Sometimes it takes time to just make the soil a little more nourished before we see some more growth. Take the time to travel at his pace and trust God to give the growth” .

I am reminded from your words, a friend loves at all times…
Thank-you for those verses…they bring the Vertical/Jesus into view…and stills the horizontal in place (me).

May God bless you and refresh you for the time and attention that you have given my question. There is a great peace in my heart tonight, a storm has been stilled.
Thank-you for letting your light shine, that I may see the path to walk in.


Thank-you, Brian for your reply, insight and great encouragement.
I have been greatly blessed by the support and replies to my question.
I will refer to your reply and encouragement often, praying to grow greatly in this understanding.
God Bless,

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You are very welcome @Sojourner :handshake:

Delcie, I see that you have already been greatly helped by the comments here. I just wanted to tell you that while my husband and I were professed Christians when we met, I can definitely say that my husband and I are similar to what you have described and I used to wonder why. But for us it seems to come down to personality. It may not be this way for you, but I am a person who finds it easy to follow, trust, love, etc. and so I have found that I am the one who had an easier time to have faith in God in even the smallest things in life. My husband is about as commando as you can get. He leads and is not a big fan of being a follower, though he has learned to do so when there is a need. I have observed that it has been harder for him to give all of his struggles over to the Lord and he finds complete abandon in faith daunting as he has the natural tendency to be in control as a leader. He is learning, ever so slowly, oh how slowly! But I trust the Spirit to work on him in His own time. In the meantime I do my best to be trusting, patient, and encouraging as a wife and I pray for my husband because he struggles with issues from a dark past. But even though I may seem like a flower that grows ever so quickly, my husband is like a large tree that is taking its time, and I believe his growth will be impressive over time. God bless you both as you grow in our Lord! :two_hearts::two_hearts:

Hi Joshua, I appreciate your simplistic explanation. I was one who asked Jesus into my life as a young person. I can’t say that I ever saw a quick, dramatic change. But I was also a sensitive child before my conversion. In the years since my conversion, I have struggled at times when I hear other Christians emphasizing the significance and importance of a dramatic change. It is especially troubling when the idea is promoted that the authenticity of conversion is confirmed by a dramatic/sudden change. It’s the Christians who have given reasurring answers, such as yours, who have helped me understand that conversion can be authentic, whether it is gradual or dramatic. Thanks again! :slight_smile:

Thank-you, Carrie, such good encouragement. Your sharing from your walk so speaks to my heart and it also reminds me of the song, by Twila Paris…How Beautiful…is the Body of Christ.
Blessings of His grace,

I am beginning to choose the flowers that I will plant about our yard soon, as the last traces of snow are quickly disappearing…I think I will look for plants that take a bit more care and that bloom a bit later in the summer than my usual fast growing, easy care, already well grown from the nursery…not that there is anything wrong in choosing that path…but this year my theme and purpose may have a different purpose ….grace, patience, maybe just one or two varieties instead of many bright, colorful, fast growing plants.
May our roots grow deep in Jesus love, thank-you for walking with me today.

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Delcie, I also am a gardener and I find many parallels in my work with plants with God and His relationship with us. I love your idea of purposefully growing things throw year that make more patience and care! What lessons we learn from God’s wonderful creation! He has obviously embedded many things for us to learn in everything around us. :heart:

Hi Carrie,

I would love to hear about your gardening and what you grow in your gardens this year.

My oldest daughter has always referred to her life as a garden that God is growing.

Isn’t it amazing how God does reveal Himself in everything that is around us, concerns us and how He longs for us, to know/see Him, in all things.

Our gardening is just very small areas that we grow flowers and vegetables in, we are not by any means green thumb gardeners.

My husband grows the vegetables, and does the freezing and canning. I try my hand at flowers.
Mostly potted flowers around our deck. Pansy’s will always grow well, as long as I remember to keep them watered.:blush:

I am trying to keep some cowslips growing around a very wet area on the side of our house, our sump pump empties into this area, so I dug a bit of a pond…18 inches by a rough 24 inches long…and planted
cowslips around it. We shall see if they come back up this Spring.

It is always fun to see what plants survive the winter and come up once again the next year.

I must go and rake all the little pine cones and late fall leaves that didn’t fall off from the trees until after it snowed😁 It is a beautiful day to be outside!

Have a good and safe peace-filled day,:latin_cross:


I almost missed your email, it went to my junk email…so glad that I checked on what was in there! You now will come to my inbox.

When, may I ask, did you and your husband accept Christ? If you would like to share your testimony I am sure many would be blessed to read about it!

I have dabbled in many types of plants, learning that I should experiment slowly because their care can take a lot of time and I also have a family that needs me. :wink: I’ve done well with flowers and hope to be able to try my hand more at vegetables next year when a garden bed is dug.

It sounds like you and your husband have a good hobby that you can share! There can be much growing together in that capacity. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: