Division in the family

Hello,my name is not important but I want to thank you for this ministry for actually giving the opportunity to speak to others because we dont see that everywhere.

As I believe that every person has their own problems and there is not a single person without them, I want to ask a question and seek a advice.
I live in a big family with plenty of relatives and we usually get along but there are times when disputes start and sometimes it can lead to harsher “conversation”. Not all of them,relative and family, are christians,some profess with their mouth their faith while their life is complete opposite. Some do not know the Lord and its hard to live together sometimes because whether you want it or not, eventually you will find yourself fighting no matter how much you look that you avoid it and even to make stuff worse some are catholics and some protestants. Im the youngest in this family and they have a long history of ups and downs and I cant see the whole picture but I heard stuff that no family can be proud off. I know the Gospel is the best solution as Im looking for opportunity to give it to them but for a person who is in general shy and telling that to a group and even worse to your family members its really difficult and I hope you will understand it but also praying to God that He would intervene and help untangle this big mess that we are all in it. I want to seek some godly advice because Im at the bottom of the food chain(when it comes to authority) and trying to fix something wont get me even an inch further. I can get more in detail but then it will be a bit to personal because Im asking this without any approval because I know people dont want to tell others that they have problems,like any of us we are to proud of to say its not all ok. Please if its possible to examine from this what I gave you and give some advice,any if its possible.

Thank you and God bless you all!


Thanks for taking the time share your concerns; I am so glad you are trying to be a good witness for God and turning to Him in prayer. As a very shy person myself who struggles to communicate the gospel, I can offer a couple suggestions that may or may not help out.

First, try to go out of your way to embody Christian love and holiness in your personal conduct, both in words and behavior. Try to find peace and joy in the midst of turmoil. Always look for a way to express a kind thought or lend a helping hand. Make people notice that there is something “different” about the way you conduct yourself; help them to understand through the witness of personal conduct that true faith really changes lives.

Second, I would advise maybe inviting a family member to go to church (or even just an event hosted by a church), suggesting that they read a Christian book, or maybe watch a Christian film. I think this can be a great way to sort of “ease” into a discussion about God and your beliefs. It may be less likely to put the other member on the defensive when compared to a more a more direct message.


Hey my brother/sister in Christ. I’m so sorry for the situation you are in. I can understand when you have a big family and as you say you are the youngest, it could be difficult to intervene. What I will tell you is that God is in the midst of you all. Things will happen whether good or bad but God will turn it for good eventually. You have to pray and ask for his guidance but at the end always say and wish that His will be done and not yours as Jesus prayed after the last supper in the garden. It may not look like it is going the way you like it but you have to trust in God and do what right by him in the things you are personally have control of. If you are asked and if you can voice an opinion say what you think in a purposeful Godly manner. Always be the peacemaker, stay in the truth, and love everyone. I will keep you in my prayers. If you feel more comfortable in speaking in private you can message me as well. Let the Holy Spirit reside in you at all times. Also don’t forget to meditate in the word of God daily. Those words created the heavens and earth. They will guide you too.

God Bless You.


Hi, thank you for sharing this with us. I can see your love for your family through your desire for them to know God.

I think as @Danageze @KLM have said that your conduct will speak a thousand words where you find it difficult to find an opportunity to communicate your faith in other ways. Start by asking God to work in your own life first. A good scripture to meditate on is:

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23

If there is a family culture of fighting and arguing, start with asking God to fill you with His peace. If there’s a culture of making wrong choices, ask God to fill you with his wisdom. If you are walking in line with the Spirit, they will start to recognise a difference in your life. Try and exercise these fruits in the midst of family circumstances. Also, keep bringing every person, relationship and circumstance to God in prayer throughout the day. If God has called you to intercede for your family, your prayers will be so important.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:6-8

And finally, don’t worry about your lack of authority within the family structure. Your quiet and ongoing prayers will be more effective than anything else.

Bless you.


Thank you for the response and Im glad you want to help and share your thoughs on this topic.
Yes it is difficult sometimes and you are not so smart to do the right thing everytime and you will make mistakes. They all did in some time get to the knowledge of the truth but as we speak Im working to try to figure out where do they stand and what are their thoughts so I can know what to do next. I think also a christian book is a good way to ease the conversation. Thank you!

1 Like

Yes it is allways good to remember the promises God said and to clinge on that even more so when life gets hard. And I see now how God is doing in my life also, through this, shaping me and molding me and it gives me great joy despite the circumstances Im facing. Yes the word of God is alive and powerful. God bless you and thanks for the support!

1 Like

I always liked philipians somehow more then other books from the bible and find courage in Paul while reading his testimony and experience. Yes we can help and give advices to others and Im thankful to you for the suport and only God can and will bring forth His will if I wait and put my hope in Him. Thank you andare God bless you!