Homosexuality vs. divorced and remarried

(Jim Tidwell) #1

I was asked this question during my interview assignment for the Bible Elective in RZIM Academy. I would love to hear some input from you guys. I am divorced and remarried for 14 years and he is a homosexual.

Why, if homosexuality is a sin and a divorce is a sin, is the homosexual living a sinful lifestyle while a divorcee that has remarried is not?

(Ethan Thomas) #2

Hey Jim! I think divorce and homosexuality rank equally as far as sin is concerned. In fact, I believe that stealing a piece of gum from the checkout line at the grocery store is also a sin equal to those two. That sounds a bit excessive, doesn’t it? You bet it does! But that’s the holy nature of God compared to mankind. EVERY SIN is equally detestable and unacceptable in the eyes of God.

Romans 3:23 says that we ALL sin and fall short of God’s standards, and it doesn’t matter what the particular sin is. I have sinned. You have sinned. everyone here posting on RZIM Connect has sinned. Galatians 3:22 says that we’re all prisoners of sin, but there is promise of freedom through Jesus Christ. By believing in Him and accepting His sacrifice for ourselves, we are forgiven of all of our sins no matter what they may be! That’s the beauty of the Gospel.

I’m sure others can give a far more detailed answer to your question, but I hope mine was helpful in some way. God bless you!

(SeanO) #3

@jtidwell If I am misunderstanding the question please correct me. My understanding is that you have one man who has been remarried after a divorce for 14 years and another man who is living an active homosexual lifestyle. The main question I am hearing is - isn’t it true that the divorcee is also living in sin?

If I have the question correct, I think this question is related to the question of whether or not the remarried man should divorce again and remarry the original spouse. In other words, is the second marriage valid or does it need to be broken up to restore the first. The below article should be helpful. It makes the point that even though the original act of getting a divorce and remarrying may be wrong (assuming no sexual immorality or abuse), the second marriage also represents a binding covenant.

What are your guys’ thoughts on this perspective? Do you feel it is valid or invalid? How come?

Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before the Lord (Deuteronomy 24:4).

“The prohibition of a wife returning to her first husband even after her second husband dies (because it is an abomination) suggests very strongly that today no second marriage should be broken up in order to restore a first one” (John Piper).

“Clearly, the second marriage—whether biblically justified or not—becomes as binding as the original marriage was supposed to be. A return to the original spouse is strictly forbidden.”

“Because marriage entails a covenant that God deems holy, any remarriage (even remarriage after an unbiblical divorce) cannot be—and should not be—forsaken as we would forsake virtually any other sin. But people who have entered into such a relationship do need to seek God’s forgiveness with sincere repentance.”


(Jim Tidwell) #4

That is exactly the question. Thanks for the resource. The remarried man is me so I feel like this question may come up again and again in my conversations with people. I want to be able to talk about it in a logical way while pointing to Jesus and His forgiveness.

(SeanO) #5

@jtidwell I hope it was helpful. May God’s Spirit give you peace, grace, wisdom and clarity as you engage with others on this issue. Please feel free to ask any follow-up / clarifying questions.

(Sandy) #6

Hello Jim, thanks for hearing my thoughts -
I will answer as I would hope to, given any questions that might come my way - particularly the personal ones like this.
I believe what the world needs (as did and do we still) is honesty. Hearts are crying out for Truth, and that’s only displayed through our real lives…they want the genuine. That’s the only way to truly point to Jesus. So…thanks for asking!
To your interviewee…
I would first, acknowledge Father’s great mercies for having brought you through your divorce(though it was not his plan) and His restoration that’s seen you blessed with family again. For this is a testimony to the never-ending love of God and His Amazing Grace that’s greater than ‘any’ sin! In this, I think, you have the opportunity to paint a picture of the heart of God…through the awesome sacrifice He made for the world, including for this guy. Share with him the Power of the Gospel - in that no matter what we’ve done, not only is complete and total forgiveness available, but the free gift of God’s own righteousness as well, to live out the life where sin no more dominates us. Rom1:16-17, 2Cor5:21. The Power to rise above all that bind us, no matter what that is. That’s the distinction of our Faith - that we don’t fight a losing battle striving in our own strength to be ‘good’. As you not only draw on Jesus for wisdom and the right words, but emphasize the truth of the very Spirit that raised Him from the dead, now living in you to overcome - this, I pray will give hope to this person that he too can come and partake. We know that no matter what he feels or says, he’s not free to be who he was created to be and therefore has no peace. It’s about the gospel - it always is - but we must know where the power lies…as Paul came to that heaping revelation. Let’s strive to grow in Grace!
Best to you in continued conversations with him, that you win him to Christ for God’s Glory and your encouragement and growth! God bless!