How Do We Deal With Family Members Who Have Walked Away From the Faith?

Hi Kasey! I’m sorry this isn’t a “Harvard” deep philosophical question. My husband and I are Taylor alums. It was a great place for us to grow in our faith and to meet each other. Kasey, two of our adult children also went to Taylor(It could have been any school). They both seemed strong in their faith going to Taylor but both left Taylor turned away from their faith. Our adult kids are very concerned that their father and I will not vote the way they want us to. They want to have an intervention on a zoom call with us. I have a feeling there are many Christian parents whose children have been pulled into this culture. The rejection and separation this is bringing Is very painful. I believe it is a time of great testing of our faith and who is priority in our lives. How can we communicate our love yet have good boundaries with our adult kids?


Hi everyone, great to be with you this week! Love this opportunity to sharpen each other with questions and conversations. I’ll be replying via video messages, so keep an eye out for those throughout the week!

@Lindylou, want to start with your incredibly relevant question. I have a lot of thoughts and I just want to say, thank you so much for your thoughtful + honest post. Will have a video up tomorrow and eager to hear your thoughts.


@Lindylou, here’s pt. 1 of my response on how do we deal with family members who have walked away from the faith?

The two books I reference are:

Boundaries - Henry Cloud

Emotionally Healthy Spirituality - Peter Scazerro

PS You might have noticed a bug hitch a ride around 5:29 :laughing:Just want to say, I found him right after filming and sent him along his merry way. Too funny - hope it wasn’t distracting!!! That’s what I get for filming outside :sweat_smile:

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@Lindylou Here’s part 2 about politics. No bug this time :smirk:

Eager to hear your thoughts! Thanks again Lynn- praying for you as you navigate these convos with your kids.


Kasey, thank you for taking the time to share God’s wisdom with me. I feel encouraged to find the question behind the question with my kids. I have been praying a lot about my words. I really want God to give me a listening heart with thoughtful answers, to be soft spoken and still firm in what I believe.
I have been carrying my kids for a long time. It is hard for me to not go over and over in my mind how I failed them. This was going to be my biggest accomplishment raising my kids to love Jesus. So yes, I have put them up on the pedestal. I guess we are all trying to find our value in something around us. I need to go back to the Lord for my value. You have helped me see that those are way to big of expectations to have put on my kids.
There were many more things you said that were helpful to me. I’m sure I will go back over your messages many times. I’ve shared them with my husband also. God has us so together on this, I’m so grateful for that.
So our kids are calling us Friday night. If you happen to think of us, if you would pray for a God honoring conversation. That Michael and I could hear the question behind the question.
We are praying for RZIM, for unity and strength right now.

Thank you so much!
Lynn Darling


@Lindylou, man, thank you so much for this response. I can so clearly see the tenderness and humility that the gospel calls us to in your words. May God give you the wisdom, compassion and love of truth that you’re praying for, and may he work these conversations for your eternal good and the good of your children. Praying for you sister. I think these words from the book of James might be for you:

3:13 “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.

3:17 “But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.”
1:5 “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”
And take heart! The battle is never over. He is able to do so much more, in our own hearts, lives, and relationships than we could ever ask or imagine (see Eph. 3:20!)

God bless Lynn!


Thank you so much for these videos and thank you Lynn for asking the questions so close to my own heart - especially right now- of family and politics. Kasey, you have clearly verbalized many the thoughts in my mind In response to these very questions and of what I believe the Lord has been speaking to me. I am still learning -to have the courage to voice and and give the answer for the reason I believe to family, to friends and the world. I am especially learning to honestly voice and converse with our Lord. I do believe it starts in this relationship with our Lord and grows from there. I have so much to learn - and am so thankful for the RZIM approach to apologetics as you have demonstrated in these videos. I am of retirement age and would have loved to learn more earlier in life but have to face living with my life now in Jesus. I have heard many stories of the grandmas prayers being the turning point for many people’s lives- so will be content with being faithful to what I KNOW. Thanks again. May God richly bless you.

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