I can’t begin to tell you what your experiences, openness and commitment to Christ have meant to me. About 2 years ago our daughter, then 26, told us she was gay. It was heartbreaking and to be honest, our first up close and personal encounter with homosexuality. I had always heard and believed that it was the result of abuse, a poor relationship with parents, especially the father or a very poor example of a happy marriage. None of those things were true for our daughter. While certainly not perfect, my husband and I have had a great marriage and going into our 39th year are still crazy about each other. He was and is an amazing dad who adores his daughter and our 2 sons and I loved everything about being a mom. None of us had the slightest inkling of our daughter’s struggle prior to her telling us. After reading your book, “Is God anti-gay?” and listening to you and many, many others (LOVE Rosaria Butterfield’s story!) God is teaching me about SSA and the very real struggle that it is. My biggest grief is that our daughter has walked away from the Lord, with whom she had a very sweet relationship as a little girl, loving church, Sunday school and even youth group as a young teen. I think I understand her struggle, that as long as she believed the Bible, she felt shame, and couldn’t shake the SSA, so something had to give.
We have continually expressed our love for her and have told her over and over there is NOTHING she can ever do that will ever change that. But she knows very clearly that for us the Bible is the inspired Word of God and we can’t embrace her choice to live a lesbian lifestyle. She lives several hundred miles from us. We did visit her and her girlfriend several months back and to be honest, it was the most difficult week of my life. I’m grappling with how to show her love (and her girlfriend who is also made in the image of God) while watching them snuggle, kiss and caress each other. It is so much easier to do so over the phone, or when she comes home alone and we aren’t face to face with it. We really, really want to be Jesus to our daughter, and that is our greatest prayer, that his kindness will lead her to repentance and she will call him Lord. But in the waiting we still want to be part of her life. Can you give us some advice? “What would Jesus do?” is my very real question. Would he watch them in relationship and ignore it and just talk about other things? I know she doesn’t need, or want, to hear our thoughts and beliefs on the matter as she grew up knowing where we hang our hats. Her question early on was “Why can’t you just be happy for me? Isn’t that what love really means, you want me to be happy?”
Again Sam, I so appreciate your ministry and I’ve found so much hope through it. God bless.