My dad is on home hospice with me caregiver. He is dying. What spirituality should I do?

My dad is dying. I’m at home doing hospice with him. Spiritually, besides praying, what can I do?

3 Likes

Hi @Babychristian, I am so sorry to read that you are taking care of your dad in his last days. You are doing the very best thing in praying! This prayer can take different forms - sometimes you might ask God for help in your situation, and sometimes you might be just spending time in God’s presence.

May I ask if your dad knows the Lord?
Is he able to enjoy listening to music? If so, it might be nice to have some gentle worship music playing in the background. Likewise, if he is open to it, you might want to read some Bible passages out loud to him.

God bless you in this difficult time. May you know His hand strengthening you and bringing you comfort.

Psalm 23:

1 The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
3 he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
4 Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
6 Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.

5 Likes

Hello dear @Babychristian. This is a very difficult question because circumstances are not the same in every case. I have a 10 year old daughter. My wife was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She died within 3 months. She was a theologian and a woman of prayer. I knew her cancer was hard to detect and difficult to treat. In fact, we can say that there is no cure. The only option is to reduce the tumour and minimize the fast spreading cancerous cells. But we still hoped for a miracle.
We were far away in another city. Against the suggestion of several family members, I decided to keep her in the oncology ward so that she won’t suffer much pain. She passed away a day after we brought her home.
Though you haven’t mentioned it, your father probably know that he might not make it. He is probably a believer too.
Continue to pray for him holding his hands. Take time to read selected scripture verses to him. Stop visitors because he needed to rest and the lesser the noises the better. Do not left him alone. It is natural for a person to trust or feel good in the presence of some particular family members. Let those people stay by his side day or night on a rotation basis. Remind him that life is in the hands of the Almighty God. Remind him to accept the will of God whether he will recover or not. Remind him that even if he goes away to be with the Lord, you will surely meet him again someday. Listen attentively to whatever he might say. Make him as comfortable as you can.There is nothing better you can do for a dying person then to surround him with his loved ones.
Stay strong in the Lord. Praying for your dad, for you and all your near and dear ones.

8 Likes

Good Evening Sister
Mark 16:18
The last part.of that verse says they will lay hands on the sick and they will recover

Thank you for responding. I have just now been able to read responses. At the age of 15 or 16 years old, I was in the ER with a “real migraine headache”, when I first tried to discuss GOD with my dad. :flushed: WOW?! He didn’t hold back. He was loud and terribly upset. He explained that there is no GOD? If there was, then why do all the bad things in life happen. Why did his father die of heart attack at the age of 40 with my dad as a witness. Why did his youngest brother loose his leg in Vietnam … Questions I couldn’t answer at the time and I was in so much pain.
A couple of months before he died, I tried to talk to him again. He let me know that his knowledge of the Bible was poor because he really hadn’t read it & no one was ever there to teach him or set an example for him. Very :cry: sad.
A friend of mine told me that he had been saved at a revival in the 1990s😀. When I brought that up, he said he would never be tricked like that again! He said, “I know that I’m going to hell!”
He said that he had his beliefs & I had mine. Told me to shut up and not to talk about it again or he was going to hurt my feelings and that I wasn’t going to like it. The look in eyes were black and it scared me. He said that his relationship with Jesus was between them and it’s no one else’s business!
This statement shocked me, was he acknowledging that there is a JESUS?
No one cared about my dad except my stepmother and I. (He must have been really hurting inside or a psychopath?) He spent times in prison. He did terrible, terrible things in his life. I don’t know what will happen to him. I understand that GOD only knows.
Some how I will have to let it go. What’s done is done.
I HAVE TO WORK ON MYSELF AND UNDERSTANDING THE BIBLE!
Now, I will do what I can for my mother. We are not allowed to talk about the Bible in her house. She is very ill also. I had in my thoughts every day, for last 2 years, which would die first, Moma or Daddy? They divorced in 1962 and still hate each other.
Taking care of my Dad at home until he died has opened my eyes to many different things.
THANK YOU LORD FOR ALL OF YOUR BLESSINGS, EVEN WHEN I DO NOT UNDERSTAND AT THE MOMENT!

3 Likes

I’m not sure when you faced such tragedy you described for us, but whenever it was, no doubt this was extremely hard for you to write, reliving your heartache and pain. Thank you for being so brave to tell and for your desire to help in such a difficult situation…to share your experience and the wisdom you received!

Pray that you and your daughter are being comforted in your sadness and doing well today! Grace and peace be unto you from our Lord Jesus Christ!

Sorry to hear of your Dad’s passing!
Know that the LORD sees your heart and all you did for your Dad in his time of need and most especially your heart for both parents to know the Lord Jesus Christ.
What a load you have borne and still bearing now with your Mom. Sorry that she’s also not doing well! Amazing how you’re able to share your life’s trials with us in the midst of it all! I applaud and thank you, and especially feel and relate to the burden of hearing loved ones reject the Gospel. But as you said, we trust in His mercy that can reach the hardest heart even in their last breath. So, rest in that truth and in the Hope of our Savior and I pray you receive the peace that He gives even now as you care for your Mom physically and spiritually! Praying that you experience His strength once more and know His all-sufficient Grace, and that many here, like me I’m sure, are inspired and will be praying for you.
Grace & peace be multiplied unto you!