I do believe celibacy is the more safe and reasonable choice for all Christians who can accept it, especially those who are SSA, but is it fair and biblically valid for the Church to make celibacy an actual mandate for SSA Christians?
It’s becoming more and more apparent to me that God’s original design for marriage was for it to be heterosexual, procreative, monogamous, and a lifetime commitment. But, to my current understanding, two other things are true: 1) God’s original design for marriage cannot be fulfilled by everyone; 2) neither can celibacy. The existence of eunuchs, let alone the existence of SSA Christians, is evidence of the former, and the teachings of Christ Himself and Paul on celibacy is evidence of the latter. If those two points are factual, wouldn’t that mean there is an existence of SSA Christians who will not be able to fulfill celibacy? Wouldn’t God be aware of this reality? Would He punish them for existing? Doesn’t the Old Testament show that God is certainly capable of at least tolerating marriages that are outside of His original design for it?
Since it seems to me that celibacy as a mandate rather than a vocation contradicts what scripture teaches on celibacy, is it possible that God accepts same-sex marriages and sexual intimacy within those marriages and that the Church should accept them as well? Or should the Church, when dealing with sexual queerness within it, abandon scriptural teachings on celibacy in order to preserve God’s original, heterosexual design for marriage and sexuality?
Here is why I’m leaning towards the former option. For one, I’m biased. I try not to be, but I know I am biased towards my own insignificant understanding of what a fair God would do. This is where my bias leads my logic: It is one thing to favor celibacy, as did Christ and Paul, and suggest that celibate SSA Christians will receive a higher reward in heaven, a reward similar to that of the faithful eunuch who will receive a name better than of sons and daughters, a name that will never be cut off. But requiring anyone with any sexuality (especially any adult who has already developed, outside of their control, a mutual physical/affectional attraction for someone) to remain celibate or else receive punishment doesn’t sound fair to me, and, again, neither does it seem to fully line up with scripture (but perhaps those teachings on celibacy as a gift/calling can be ignored in the special case of SSA in the Church). I am well aware that we will all have to make daunting sacrifices for Him, but does that really include marriage and sex for only some of His followers and not others? Aren’t SSA Christians the only non-clerical Christians required by the Church to make such a sacrifice? Is that really fair? Is that really God? Currently, I don’t think so.
It does nothing but add to my bias that I, myself, am a closeted SSA child being raised in a conservative, Christian household and selfishly seeking the least bit of confirmation that God might actually allow marriage and sex in my future, even though scripture makes it clear He would prefer that any of His followers who can accept celibacy accept it, especially those who are SSA. Whether or not the responses I receive here are anything near confirmation or validation, any feedback is helpful. Thank you.