Will God accept me back?

(Adam V) #1

I have some difficult struggles with in my family. I am going through some difficulties. I have a job I don’t really like, but have to stick it out because the it is flexible and works with the family. I don’t want to go into too much detail here. However, I think it is effecting me deeply emotionally and my relationship with the Lord.

To get relief I turn away from God and towards sin. I often say things in my mind that God can fix this, but He won’t. He could just snap his fingers and make this go away. I remember the verse “God plans to prosper you not to harm you.” and try to keep pushing forward.I feel like I am the luke warm person that keeps falling away from God and that he will reject me for the things I have said. The first time I believe I tried to say it out loud to my wife that “God could fix it, but he won’t” I only got to the fix it part. I physically tried to say the rest, but my mouth was froze. I couldn’t say the rest even though I wanted to. I think that is a sign that the Lord is still with me.

I hope God hasn’t given up on me even thought I keep falling away. Is He going to eventually tell me to go away I never knew you?

(SeanO) #2

@Adam_V My friend, Jesus always forgives us when we come to Him in sincere repentance. When you come to Christ your situation may not change, but Jesus will change you - He will give you a new heart and the strength to face your situation. Pray for forgiveness and pray for wisdom - wisdom to know God and to navigate life. Find solid Christian community and study God’s Word. Be patient as you grow. When we sin, confess and obey. Keep your eyes on Christ and not on your own issues or struggles.

I John 1:9 - If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

I recommend Matt Chandler’s book on the Gospel - I think reading it may help you understand more clearly what it means to walk with Jesus. Feel free to ask more questions. The Lord Jesus grant you a spirit of wisdom and revelation in knowledge of Him :slight_smile:


Suffering in Our Lives

One important thing to understand is that Jesus does not promise us an easy life. Jesus has conquered the world and our hope is not in this life. Jesus has promised us an eternity with Him where there will be no more tears, sorrow or pain - but in this life we will face many struggles.

John 16:33 - I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

Here are a few RZIM videos on suffering:

(Adam V) #3

Thank you for the quick response. I will continue to work on my knowledge and try to find a good christian group to join in my area. I hope that God continues to bless you and the RIZM ministry.

I hope that one day I may meet Ravi, if I get the chance. Otherwise maybe just email him on how grateful I am for him doing what he does. I really look up to him.

Thanks again. Have a great day.

(SeanO) #4

@Adam_V I would like to meet Ravi one day as well friend. Richest blessings in Jesus!

(C Rhodes) #5

Just know that how GOD feels about you does not mirror any of your sentiments with your life. The enemy would like you to believe that GOD will extend only a certain amount of patience with you and your failings. But you are known by GOD.

You may make choices that prove disastrous for your life, but it does not change GOD’s love, hope, nor patience for you. Don’t hate on yourself, keep seeking GOD’s face, maintain a heart that repents. Don’t decide when enough is enough. Your relationship with the Lord is well worth playing that tune as often as you need to.

GOD will provide the ‘crystal blue persuasion’ that you need to move past the sins that so easily beset you. And even on a hateful job, there is something for you. Ask GOD for the ability to see and promote that benefit. You can trust GOD’s heart even in your discomfort.

(David Bruce Young) #7

One of my favorite scripture passages is John 12:27,28.
Jesus is speaking. "Now is my soul troubled. And what shall I say? ‘Father, save me from this hour’? But for this purpose I have come to this hour. 28 Father, glorify your name.” Then a voice came from heaven: “I have glorified it, and I will glorify it again.”
It was God’s will for our Lord’s heart to be troubled. It was an opportunity to glorify His Father.
I also think of Paul’s word in 2 Corinthians 12.
“So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
God’s promise to you is not to take you out of the trial but to make you like Jesus. And there is no joy like glorifying Him as you grow in fellowship with Him.

(Jared Cullison) #8

Adam, my heart goes out to you. I have been in a difficult season myself.

One thing I have realized is that, ultimately, I have been operating throughout my life trying to please myself rather than God. I have had to repent of this and realize the difference between worldly sorrow and godly sorrow. I can tell my wife “I’m sorry”, when I have wronged her, but am I truly repentant or just uncomfortable with the consequences and trying to smooth things over?

Godly sorrow leads us to repentance - an active growth, maturing and walking in the opposite direction away from our sin, even within circumstances we don’t enjoy.

Run to the Lord. He is the only one who will ever satisfy the deepest longings of our heart. Thank Him in the middle of the pain, realizing that it is the trials that form character and bring us back to realizing we need Him.

Roman 5:3-5 "Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”

Let the truth of God’s love guide your mind and heart. You have everything you need in Him. His love is not dependent on what you do. Honor Him, responding back to Him in love, keeping your mind watchful, thankful and determined to run the race to win.

May His grace empower you to grow and mature in the fullness of Christ!

‭‭1 Peter‬ ‭1:13‬ “Therefore, preparing your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

(Mike Sweeney) #9

Expect to be tested by God. Continue to pray For God answers every prayer. The answer he gives you, in many cases, is not the answer you expect. Expect what God has promised. He does have a plan for you. His prophet Jeremiah was correct. His plan is for you to be with Him in heaven. In order to fulfill His plan, you must always do His will. Success is only found in heaven and in the presence of God Your worldly plans will only be successful if they are His plans. The plans of this world will soon pass. The plan for you in heaven is for eternity.

(Kathleen) #10

@Adam_V - I’ve had this thread open for a couple of days now with the intention of responding. So sorry it has taken me this long! But I did want to tell you that ever since I read this a couple of days ago, I’ve been praying for you and your family. Deep discontent or unhappiness in one place can effect every other area of life, so my heart goes out to you!

More often that I’d like to admit, I am right there with you in the cry of ‘Why isn’t God fixing this?! Is it because He won’t or because He can’t?’ It’s a pretty terrible spiral of despair to be in. I don’t know what your specific situation is, but I wanted to take a shot in the dark with some encouragement.

  1. God has promised to take away our guilt, not our humanity. A wise man named Sy Rogers said that in a talk I was at a couple of years ago, and, in my moments of struggling with my own indwelling sin, it has brought me a strange sort of comfort. It is human to struggle…whether that’s with sin (either our own or the sin of others) or with our own limitations. I don’t know what you’ve asked God to take away or bring you relief from, but you are in good company with the apostle Paul (and countless others!) on that front. He writes to the church in Corinth…

Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” [2 Cor. 12:8-9]

I really do hate it when God says that. :smirk: But slowly I myself am learning to say, ‘Fine, God. Fine. What do you want to do in me and through me in this?’

  1. Our work is often tied to our purpose in life…our identity. I am a person who, when I have unfulfilling work, I have an identity crisis. If the work I do is thwarted or disrespected, I easily give up. If I’m not making some kind of contribution, even if only in my small little sphere of influence, I don’t often see the point not only of the job, but of myself. God has recently been chipping away at how I find my worthiness as a human being in this way…and it HURTS. Do you think your own struggles at your job could be characterised in this way?

  2. The turning to God is what is probably going to be the most difficult thing in all of this…esp. if you think he will react negatively when you do. If you’re like me, the first thing to go when I’m mad at God is reading His word. There are some good Psalms of lament that express deep anger and frustration. Maybe find one of those which resonate with you and pray the words back to Him?

Everything is connected, so this may take a while to unpick, as you could find any number of things tied up in this. But don’t despair, brother. God is with you in this. He has promised to transform us…but not all in one go. Each time we turn back to him, we are changed. God does discipline those He loves, so whatever your sin, be sure to know that He will come after it. However, in the midst of it, remember that He is also full of compassion and loving-kindness.

Praying, brother.

(Monica Diane Hall) #11

Adam, always remember James 4:6"God opposes the proud , but gives grace to the humble." I have found when I’m in the grip of a sin I can’t or won’t give up pride is at the root of it. I’ve come to know that pride is me acting from the place of believing I have a better idea than everyone else. Including God. It has never turned out well for me when I operate from that place. Ask Him to show you any lingering pride and repent and renounce it. You are not alone. You are cherished and loved.

(Sanchia_J) #12

@Adam_V I relate 100% to what you are going through. I am unemployed for about a year now, and been volunteering at various places (Cos I cant just sit at home and wait it out!). All this while I’ve been praying for the Lord to open a door for me, and still nada. Most of my friends are atheists, so its also kind of embarrassing when they are prospering and the Christian is at home trying to make ends meet. In my frustration I’ve said some pretty nasty things about God because like yourself, I know that he can fix this with a snap of his fingers. I’ve also wondered if my unemployment is punishment for something I’ve said or done and if he is gonna tell me : I don’t know you, you wicked servant. I also feel I yo-yo a lot . Its easy to slip into a lifestyle that doesnt glorify God as relief from the frustration.

When that happens I go back to the Bible. Reading his word helps bring stability to my mind and heart. When we do sin, God will pick us up. The Lord showed me recently that my actions does not equate to him loving me. Nothing I do will make Him love me more or less, because then it will be my effort, and not His work in my life. It doesn’t mean its a license to sin, but it means that I shouldn’t judge myself when I slip up or work harder to please God. God will do the work in you.

God loves you soooooo much. He knows your frustrations during this trying time. Isaiah 48:10 says: Behold, I have refined thee, but not with silver, but in the furnace of affliction. Actually that whole chapter is pretty comforting.

I’m going to pray for you and your family, that you will be like Gold after this.
Much love.

(Tim Ramey) #13

@Adam_V You have been given posts full of wisdom. Some will strike closer to home more than others but they all speak the truth.

Adam, I may be wrong but I feel that you have two issues that weigh heavily on you. The first was addressed by most of the posts and that is the Lord loves you, forgives you and will never, ever forsake you. What a heartening promise! It’s sounds too good to be true. But it is true.

The second issue has also been raised in some of the posts but I think it is what is troubling you just as much. That is I think you wonder, if my hearts wants the Lord so badly, why doesn’t He deliver me? Sure, He died for me but He doesn’t want me to be stuck in my sin so why do I not get deliverance from it? I sense this because for so many years, I was stuck and wanted the Lord with all of my heart but felt like a car being pushed out of a snow drift - the wheels spun and I moved a little but I always just slipped back into the ditch. I realized that apart from Jesus I can do nothing so what gives? He knows I’m stuck, why doesn’t He shove me out? Why am I not victorious over this sin?

If, in fact, that is what you are asking, it is a valid question. Adam, the Lord desires to be your victory even more than you want it. It is so wonderful that the Holy Spirit knows you better than you know yourself because you feel you know what needs to be fixed and how it should happen. However, the Holy Spirit is trying to get through to you that, first of all, if there is any condemnation, it is not from me. I (The Holy Spirit) only offer freedom and victory. But you are not letting me deal with the root of the problem, only the symptom.

Now this is where our Hope lies because hope is something that is not just wishful thinking, it is expecting. Why? Because you want it? No - because Jesus love you, died for you and was raised for you so that you could start a new life - so new that it is new EVERY day.

So Adam, do not be discouraged but take heart. The Lord is your Victory. He will do it but though you would say with everything that is in your heart it is what you want as well, it isn’t. (No condemnation here) but the Lord doesn’t want to gloss over you but to help you walk in the freedom planned for you and He is such a Redeemer, that He will take that sinful nature and use it for His glory as you will know how to speak to others with the same battle before them.

Adam, we are all in this together. You are not a dirtball but a saint. Don’t get introspective but rest in the Lord as freedom from sin is probably your focus and not Jesus. Adam, I can’t say that I will pray for you every day but I will pray that the Lord performs a surgery to your heart that you never would have expected. I’m so glad that I can share with you out of experience - not talking down to you but face-to-face as a brother that needs Jesus every second of the day. I’m so grateful the the Lord has not allowed you to be content that you are saved but desire to live the fullness of the life that He created you for.

I’m not proficient at communicating but I hope that something of what I said make sense. If is is not of the Lord, I pray that you’d just drop it. If it is of the Lord, love Him with everything and you will testify to His faithfulness if you let Him - guaranteed!

(Adam V) #14

I want to say thank you all very much. I didn’t expect to get very many responses. I enjoyed reading them all. I hope God richly blesses all of you. Thank you so much! I also want to thank Ravi because he has allowed us all to connect together through this site.

(Mariana Aguirre) #15

Hi Adam. Was refreshing the sincerity of your words. We all in this walk with The Lord. Romans 7. But what is impossible for us is possible With God. I suggest that spent more time alone with the Lord, reading, meditating in His word,and asking for straighten and consistence. What you feed will grow in You, what I mean is : If you set a time with the Lord as the first thing in you day , if you ask and come with a clean heart and sincerity declaring with confidence and security that God will do what you ask agree with his mercy and will. Romans 2.29 remember us that God will write his Word in our hearts, and He is faithful and true Adam, He said and is done. All his Holy Word is True. Believe and give to Him your doubts , trusting , waiting and take the decision to make Him ,your only priority psalms 139. GOD OF THE IMPOSSIBLES.Sorry if my spelling is not the best and not much in typing.
In Christ